Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Emmys 2010

5:00 Sunday afternoon I hand over the dinner preparations to George the Elder and I settle down on the couch to watch the 2010 Emmy Awards. I was initially unsuccessful. Henry was already watching Men Who Stare At Goats (is he the only one in the English Speaking world that thought this movie was funny?). He wasn't willing to give up the set. I wasn't willing to put my life on the line for it. He finished watching, I recorded the show.

At 6:00 I successfully waded through the 17 button pushes sequence to get to my DVR recording of the Emmys. I was disappointed to realize that I inadvertently missed the first 4 minutes of the opening sequence while engaged in my minor tug of war with Henry. Alas. It repeats at 8:00 here on the West Coast, so I started a second recording. Rumor had it there was a funny bit with Betty White right at the very beginning and who, I mean who, doesn't like Betty White?

My observations...
  • Worst dress EVER goes to January Jones. Damn girl. You looked like a crack head barbie stuffed in a blue shiny bell. The hair? You just get outta bed? You don't own a brush - or a comb - or a scrunchie? Or, for that matter, some lipstick? Biggest problem with the bell dress is what to do (or not) with your legs. When you were presenting you took the comfort stand - feel shoulder width apart. This only served to further solidify the whole barbie comparison. You know how Barbie can't put her legs together thanks to the plastic u-shaped who-who area and the rotating hip sockets? And then when MM won for best series you went all legs akimbo and kept crossing them and un-crossing them. Fiddle. Fiddle. Bad choice all around.
  • Funniest acceptance speech goes to Steve Levitan from Modern Family. First, the whole spoof on the Old Spice horse guy (snort snort, ha ha). And then the final line of his speech when he thanked his wife, "without whom we would probably be dating around a lot. I mean we just won an emmy - that's a pretty good opening line."
  • Twitter introduction idea. Lose it. Wasn't funny. In the least. Not once.
  • Love the Big Bang. Am so glad that Jim Parsons won. My boys think that show is hilarious. They liked seeing someone they know win. Most of the other shows - they can't watch yet. Plus, Henry relates to Sheldon.
  • Worst Hair (besides JJones) goes to Kyra Sedgewick. It looked like she put her hair in braids the day before, swam many many laps in an over chlorinated pool and then went to bed with her hair wet. During her sleep her braid became undone. She left it just as it was. Why mess with mess?
  • A note to Emily Gerson Saines (the exec producer for Temple Grandin). I feel horrid that you will forever watch your triumphant walk to the stage and your humble acceptance speech knowing that the entire viewing audience was more gob smacked by the site of your sagging breasts than you ever intended. Or at least I assume you didn't intend it. If you did - you're mean. or weird. It was scary. and sad. and most likely what my own breasts would look like in that untethered state. Two words. Two-sided tape. Another two words: better seamstress. Another two words. Get straps.
  • Ricky Gervais. You are just plain old funny. Mocking Mel at the Emmys? Brilliant.
  • Claire Daines. Right on the money in all ways. Pretty hair, pretty dress, pretty classy. And, we LOVED the movie Temple Grandin so all was right with the world (although the real Temple Grandin nearly squished Emily Gerson Saines to death during her acceptance speech- it was a nice reprieve from seeing her droopy hooters).
  • George Clooney. Great that he got the Bob Hope Award. Next time he should practice his speech more. Extemporaneous speeches? Not his strong point.
  • And finally, after recording #2 I got to see the whole opening sequence. Cute. But, I'm a Gleek - so it's not surprising. It could have only been improved by getting more unexpected glee club participants like Jack Bauer or Dexter. John Lithgow shaking his booty with Glenn Close? Now that'd be a treat.


Jana said...

Reading your post about the Emmys is even more fun than watching them. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

Snarkiest Blog Evah! Loved it....