Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Post-Mortem


"Moving" means things other than packing and unpacking, finding new digs, and starting a new routine - -new grocery stores, new schools, new jobs, new restaurants.  It also means that you have to leave old friends and try to make some new ones.  This part - - well, this part can be hard.  Especially when those friendships don't thrive given the distance.

What I've come to realize is that sometimes the friends that are the "best" while you're in a place, living a certain piece of your life - turn out to have a shelf life.  And, amazingly, sometimes the friends that you never expected to endure are those that stand the test of time.  The former are a bitter pill, the later are a real gift.

I've recently had to come to terms with recognizing that a "best-ie" friendship isn't going to make the long haul.  I keep wondering what happened.  I wonder if it's something specific that I did.  Is it that I didn't call often enough?  Is it that our "new" non-expat like isn't a spectacular match to a continuing expat life?  Is it that my newly chosen profession of "mom" doesn't suit?  I dunno.  But, whatever it is - - the friendship seems to have run its course.  Sad.  Who'd've thunk it?  Not me.  But there it is.  And I think at this point stretching out the post-mortem will serve little good.

Has this ever happened to you?  You expect a friendship to grow old with you, but for no known reason (at least to you) the friendship peters out?  Fizzzzzzzzle.

I will mourn this one and miss her.

2 comments:

Steph said...

What goes around come around, my dear.

fin said...

Yup - I have been where you are - and I too don't have the answers ! BUT - a good 5 years+ down the line, I am happy to say I never expect a phone call. Love you!!